The Autumn That Changed Me
At the beginning of this autumn, I never knew that I would reshape my life in this way.
I have been in Japan for three years. To tell the truth, I had never felt the change of seasons as much as I did this time. In my first year, I was completely unaware of how the seasons changed. All I had heard about were winter, which is said to be freezing cold with heavy snow, and spring, when the sakuras bloom and people go to admire their beauty. But there are two other amazing seasons among them: summer and autumn.
In my second year, I got pregnant with our little boy, Hitesh. The first trimester was a real mess, and I had no idea which season I was even in.
Then I stepped into a new year and began to see everything more clearly and appreciatively. So this autumn, I enjoyed every moment and stepped outside whenever I could to soak in the beauty around me. I really wanted to instil this appreciation for nature and seasonal change in our little boy. He is still only 11 months old, but I can already tell he enjoys being outside more than I could have ever imagined.
With him, I learned to slow down — truly slow down. Not just pausing for a moment of quiet, but embracing the tiny, fleeting moments of wonder my toddler experiences: the way he gasps at a pile of leaves, the curiosity in everything he touches. Watching him taught me to notice life again, in its small, beautiful details. I am usually a multitasker who does everything quickly, but he has taught me the value of slowing down.
I also learned patience — more than I ever thought possible. There were mornings I wanted to rush and evenings when thousands of household chores waited for me, but those tiny hands would hold me back, making it impossible to move anywhere. In those moments, I discovered the worth of this little human soul. I learned that it’s okay if the house is messy, if snacks spill, if plans go off track. Life with a toddler isn’t perfect, and neither am I — and that’s okay.
Autumn also reminded me of the importance of connection — not just with my little one, but with myself. While he napped, I worked on this beautiful website that I love and spent time on Facebook, Instagram, and Pinterest, platforms that inspire me. I journaled my thoughts, watched the autumn sky, and sipped my tea. Each of these moments allowed me to nurture myself. When I recharge in this way, I can be the mom I want to be and the one he needs me to be.
And maybe the biggest lesson of all? Letting go. Just like giant trees shed their leaves gracefully without pressure, I am learning to release unnecessary guilt and the weight of expectations. I sometimes try to be perfect, even though I know that is impossible, but autumn whispers to me that it’s okay to be imperfect — you can bloom tomorrow even brighter amidst the beautiful chaos of life with a toddler.
This autumn didn’t change my world in a loud way, but it changed me in a significant way.
Lessons I’m taking with me:
- Slow down and notice the little wonders.
- Patience is learned in chaos, not calm.
- Taking care of myself helps me care for my child better.
- Letting go is strength, not weakness.
- No one’s life is flawless, so don’t try to be perfect — just be your best version today.
I entered autumn juggling life with my baby, and I’m leaving it calmer, more present, and deeply grateful for the lessons my toddler has unwittingly taught me so far.
