I have always written my life in a diary, I can’t exactly remember how I came up with the idea. But I can hardly remember my mother writing some notes. I missed this for some time but began jotting down stuff in earnest. One fine morning I read some years old notes.
Pretty intense stuff everywhere. And the authentic version of my feelings. How I felt about some incidents. Everything is in one place. A wonderful life journey. The feeling of revisiting my diaries is something like calling my younger version. A strange feeling horrible sensation.
Many kinds of stuff including arguments with my mother in my teens and later a full page of endless self-regret. Hundred of films watched together with my sister, fights and adventures we had all my desires, plans, loneliness, love, relationship, anger, and jealousy were hidden inside. What a life I had! Each part is smelling.
20’s is an exciting and adventurous year of one’s life, you are engaging with so many and busy with both necessary and unnecessary stuff. friendship breakups, academic stuffs, new feelings a new chapter of life. Once I was in an unhealthy relationship. Do I need to have this? Will I ever have peace of mind with this? I had questioned myself. And I was navigating major life decisions. With time I am seeing how I have changed my topics, and how my feelings and thoughts work. My 30’s I am learning from my past relationships and led my life to a great way and ended in a great plus comfortable marriage.
Sometimes some thoughts and feelings were soo gross to let anyone see sometimes. “No intimacy test “with this regard!! LOL!! Sometimes I wonder where would I place all these stuff!
My writing saved me most of the time. what I was doing, what danced in my mind all conveyed in the diaries. My set of diaries the one who knows me better. One of my friends told me that she threw all her old diaries away and she is feeling good now. But I am still figuring out this!
What do you feel when revisiting all, Have you ever thought about what can you do with all old diaries and journals? I am looking forward to hearing from you.
